Most tips for creating sympathetic characters point out that our characters need flaws. And that’s very true.
But it can be a real trick to show flaws for characters who bottle up their emotions in an attempt to hide their weaknesses. While very common, that defense mechanism can leave very little for us, as authors, to show.
In my own writing, my desire to create strong characters led me to sometimes emphasize how they didn’t let things bother them. And sometimes that emphasis came at the expense of sharing their fears with the reader.
This was a Bad Thing. *smile* Our characters might not be vulnerable to anyone else, but they usually need to allow a bit of vulnerability with the reader so the reader can form a connection with them.
Some stories or voices might be so compelling that they can get away with unsympathetic and/or completely invulnerable and closed-off characters. But in general, characters who are vulnerable to the reader are easier for readers to embrace.
So how do we create a crack in a character’s armor where a reader can connect to them? It might depend on how self-delusional they are. *grin*
The Self-Delusion Scale
While a “normal” character (who would probably be quite rare) might admit their fears, characters who bottle up their emotions won’t. How we expose their emotions anyway might depend on how self-aware they are.
Do they recognize their weaknesses and know they’re covering up their fears? Do they consciously avoid thinking of them? Or have they internalized their fears so much that they can’t acknowledge them in any way?
Each of those levels creates different opportunities to show vulnerability to the reader. Characters are unique, and how they react to challenges will show what kind of a person they are inside.
Note that one character might use multiple coping mechanisms to deal with different weaknesses. So a character might fall into all three of the types described below.
Type #1: The Self-Aware, Closed-Off Character
Along the scale, this coping mechanism is the easiest to show, and many of our characters’ weaknesses will fall into this category. (It’s actually a rare character who would reveal their weaknesses to others, especially at the beginning of a story.)
This approach is also mentally “healthy,” so characters wouldn’t necessarily “grow out it” over the course of the story. Instead, we’d see the character overcome their fears despite how difficult it is. They’d need to dig deep for the strength to do what needs to be done.
Characters using this defense mechanism are aware of their flaws and make a conscious choice to cover up their weaknesses. All of us can probably think of some of our flaws that fit into this category.
I can be painfully uncomfortable in group situations (to the point that I’ve had panic attacks before every in-person writing conference I’ve attended). On the inside, I’m cringing and thinking everything I say is idiotic and any silences are uber-awkward and my responsibility to fix. But if you met me in person, you’d never know all that was going on in my head, as on the outside, I’m friendly and outgoing.
Both are the real me. It’s a conscious choice on my part to push my outgoing nature to the foreground to cover up my internal freak-out.
Similarly, we could show this dichotomy in our characters with their actions and behaviors conforming to the “strong character” expectations, while their thoughts would be more revealing. This can be a perfect situation to use deep point of view.
We wouldn’t necessarily need to give the play-by-play of their weakness like I did for the effects of my discomfort above, but we could have the deep point of view walk the reader through their thought process to cover up something. We could include internalizations that expose a fear and their determination to push past it.
Her stomach flipped over, imitating the pancakes she’d eaten for breakfast. But she wouldn’t know if she could do it unless she tried. And she was beyond sick of being left behind. Even sicker than her stomach’s protest at what she was about to do.
Type #2: The Character in Denial
This coping mechanism is the second easiest to show if we know a few tricks. Characters who use this technique might not be conscious or self-aware enough to acknowledge their weaknesses. However, they still struggle with their flaws. The trick with these characters is show that struggle.
Assuming we’re in a non-omniscient point of view (meaning a first person or limited third person POV), we might not be able to come right out and state what these characters’ issues are, what their fears are, what they long for that’s different from their current situation. But we can give hints and use subtext.
We can show them start a thought and cut themselves off or push the thought away. While they might not actively recognize their situation, they can actively deny those thoughts a place in their head. We can also use words that seem slightly out of place from the rest of the thought to reveal their subconscious mindset.
Simply by showing what they’re not thinking, the readers will see hints of what’s going on behind the scenes in their head. Sometimes what isn’t said can be just as revealing as what is said. Or sometimes a few words adding more specificity than needed can reveal their priorities.
Her father walked away without a single word of praise for her top grades. Would it be so much to ask—?
She cut off the pointless thought and trudged up to her room.
Type #3: The Internalized Character
This coping mechanism can be the trickiest to show because characters who use this technique have internalized their situation so completely they can’t see an alternative. Without that ability, they can’t think about how things could be different—or even cut off such thoughts.
Instead, these characters have internalized their weaknesses and fears into a false belief. My post about false beliefs gives fifteen ideas on how to show a character’s fear when they’re not consciously aware of it.
We can also show these characters’ weaknesses by creating situations that poke at their soft spots. The more specific we make their reactions—their thoughts, their actions, their evasiveness, their defensiveness—the more clear their false belief will be. The reader will see the truth of their character despite their lack of awareness.
She leaned closer and grabbed his arm. “What do you mean you can’t come to the dance with me? You promised. We were going to dress up, hang out, and make fun of all the losers who came by themselves.”
Now what was she going to do tonight?
Additional Tips for Building Vulnerable Characters
Deeply Understand Their Weaknesses: Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi’s new The Negative Trait Thesaurus has more tips about how to show flaws and weaknesses, along with tools to help us brainstorm and develop those traits.
Use Subtext: Many times a reader’s understanding of the flaws will come from the subtext, the negative space. What or who are they avoiding? What are they not saying or doing?
In the last example above, subtext provides two clues of her fear: she thinks people who would go to the dance alone are losers, and the thought never occurs to her to go by herself after he cancels on her. Therefore, she’s afraid of going alone and being alone. She’s afraid she’s a loser and needs the “prop” of someone with her to convince herself she’s not.
Use the Rule of Three: Whatever we decide to show about their weaknesses, remember the rule of three. The rule of three states that we should expose readers to an idea three times.
- If we mention something once, it can seem out of character.
- If we mention something twice, readers might suspect it’s important but not pick up on the pattern.
- If we mention something three times, readers will know it’s important and recognize the pattern for what it means for the character or story.
Get Feedback: After a trusted beta reader or critique partner has read our story and given feedback, ask questions. Write up the characters’ fears, goals, motivations, etc. in straightforward language, and ask your reader if they didn’t pick up on any of those details, or if any of them should be strengthened. If they didn’t pick up on one of a character’s fears or desires, more development of that aspect is needed.
This can be a tricky thing to get right. We don’t want to be too “on the nose,” but we also don’t want readers to miss out on some of the character’s layers. Otherwise our character will seem superficial, no matter how much development we’ve completed behind the scenes.
Our goal is to bring those layers onto the page, where the reader can see character aspects they relate to and recognize within themselves. Where the reader can form connections with our characters. And where the reader can enjoy the full extent of our imagination. *smile*
Do you have characters so guarded they don’t want to reveal themselves to the reader? How have you cracked their armor? Will any of these tips help you? Do you have any other suggestions or tips to add?
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